Beyond the Norms

This is one of the most difficult parts of a love life to get over, it is how to get over a relationship break up. It is tough nursing a broken heart, and we all need a little help to get over this broken heart. The lesson here is that friends and family, basically company, is need always to get over a heart break.

The first love, the someone whom you most probably would have decided there and then that you would probably spend the rest of your life with him or her. But sometimes it ends. And it is most painful when it ends abruptly. Arguments are perfectly normal, but when it gets to a certain breaking point, you know that it cannot continue, and you two end the relationship. Or when your partner cheats on you. That is probably the most painful and when you have to break up.

As impossible as it may seem, the rule of thumb to deal with this is to tell yourself that you want to get over him or her. If there is still a little bit inside you that wants it to still work out, then you will never get over your ex or the reciprocative lover (one-sided crush). And nothing you do will ever work. It has got to start with inside yourself. Your mind is the most powerful after all. And you need to stay away from him or her during the initial period till you are comfortable with meeting him again. Chances are, if you keep being in the company of him or her, you will NEVER get over it and you will be stuck. So please, be brave and take the first step and avoid the person. And while you are avoiding the person,

• Talking to someone about the break up. You need to let it out! Bottling it up inside of you is never going to solve your problem. Always verbalize your problems to a listening ear. Any problem whatsoever. Talk to someone in a similar situation helps too.

• Get busy. Occupy yourself with meaningful things like picking up a hobby or learning something new or preoccupying yourself with books and work.

• Watch funny movies, read funny comics, chill and laugh around with your friends. Laughter as always is the best medicine. It always makes you feel better no matter what.

• Get rid of whatever items that remind you of your partner. Numbers, messages, letters, gifts. If you can’t bear to throw them away, put them with your close friend or somewhere you can’t easily get to.

This is mean but pretty effective. Start to concentrate on the negative aspects of your partner’s character and tell yourself it is not worth it.

Another mean thing to do and it might cause someone else hurt. I do not think it is wise but the thing is you might meet someone better. Go dating, meeting new people, making new friends. Caution: You might fall in love again so be sure to keep your distance. Moving on to someone else to get over someone is effective but not the ideal way to go about doing things. But please don’t give anyone the hear break.

Write down all the hurts and angst inside you on a piece of paper and throw it away. Make the getting over tangible. Helps heaps too.

Once again, talk to your friends, hang out with them! Friends are your pillars of support and as they say ‘a friend in need is a friend indeed.’ Let all your grief out.

Disclaimer: Effective love advice on how to get over a relationship break up is an article submitted by one of the readers.

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